Stress is relative...

Today was kind of a crazy day at work, but at least I was able to focus and get a lot of work done. I've kept thinking about how a year ago today, that was definitely not the case. That was the day that I accepted a new position at work... but even that was not by any means stressful.

The anxiety came primarily from a text from my mom, letting me know that my brother, Tom, had been in an accident involving a basketball standard, and could I please let both sets of grandparents know. (In her defense, she and my dad and youngest sister, Christine, were in Florida for a dental convention; I believe my mom and Christine were at Disney World that day. But all I knew from the text was that he'd had to get staples in his head, had a concussion, and that he had had a blessing.) I think most of the stress came from having very limited information and from feeling so helpless--Tom was in Colorado on his mission, still; I was in Utah; my parents were in Florida. I know we were all worried, but none of us could actually do anything.

It helps to put things in perspective... I feel confident that it is because of his faithful missionary service and the power of the priesthood that he healed quickly and has had no after-effects.

Strange to post about this now, a full year later? Maybe. It's just been on my mind again. Just as I'm happy to be alive, I'm happy my brother is alive and well, and I'm excited for his upcoming wedding. :)

Foreign language mode? Я ничего не хочу...

(Note: for my Russian speaking friends, "Я ничего не хочу" has nothing to do with this post, except that it is the phrase that came to my mind as I sat here deciding that I've had enough of doing homework for tonight.)

I wonder if any of my polyglot friends have felt this way... I'm learning Spanish now, but I find myself thinking in Russian as soon as my very limited Spanish vocabulary/grammar fails me. I had a similar experience when I was first learning Russian, only then it was the Hebrew that would slip back in.

I guess I also felt it to some degree following my last Hebrew class, when I was first living in the German House. The first semester that I was not taking Hebrew, a friend of mine would sometimes speak to me in Hebrew. I understood everything without too much difficulty, but at that time I couldn't answer in Hebrew, no matter how much I wanted to. At some point during that semester, the German finally "clicked." I had my first dream in German, and everything just seemed to come naturally. It seems my brain finally created a partition for German, separating it from other foreign languages, recognizing it as a completely sensible, meaningful language without a need for translation. Suddenly, I could formulate sentences in Hebrew again, too. (That was entertaining, actually. This friend came by my apartment to invite me to a concert on campus, rather last minute. We held the brief conversation in Hebrew, and my roommates all assumed he had asked earlier and we'd had it planned all week long. Haha!)

That partition for German seems to have held up, but I don't think I've ever quite reached that point with any other foreign language. The Hebrew is mostly gone, from lack of use. I still remember one or two songs, and a few phrases from dialogues we memorized, but not much else. (Sad, I know... Maybe someday I'll pick it up again. If the Jerusalem Center hadn't been closed during my entire time at BYU, I might have actually found a use for it!) I think I managed to cross a hurdle in Russian which allowed me to focus on Russian without Hebrew getting in the way, but I never really reached the point of a "partition" in Russian.

So, here I am learning Spanish. We've finally learned regular "-ar" conjugations and we're starting to get a little more vocabulary, which means we're actually able to build sentences. The problem is, my vocabulary is still very limited, and once my brain switches into "foreign language mode," it still seems to think that means Russian, especially once I've reached the end of my Spanish vocabulary. I'm thinking that I need (1) to start picking up more vocabulary in Spanish and (2) to make sure I'm at least reading occasionally in Russian, so I don't lose it completely. It would be best if there could be another "partition" rather than just pushing the Russian out... Hmmmm...

Are there others out there who have learned more than one language and had similar experiences? Is there a term to describe this? I just notice that I tend to fall back on the weakest language other than the one I am currently learning. I'm not complaining so much as musing on something that I find interesting.

And the Russian phrase keeps running through my head... Я ничего не хочу! (I don't want anything! Or, more literally, I don't want nothing. I love the double negatives in Russian.) I'm done for tonight... No more homework right now. We'll try this again tomorrow.

Cockroaches, facilities maintenance, and women's voices

Odd title? Perhaps, but I'll explain. Let me say, first, that I am by no means a feminist. "Equal rights" is not appealing to me. However, I do believe that a woman's voice should be heard and taken as seriously as a man's. Unfortunately, this does not seem to be the case. I hate calling tech support and being made to feel like I'm stupid because my computer is having problems. I hate talking to police dispatch (this instance was the non-emergency number) and being expected to answer questions that should be part of their job in the first place. (For example: "I'm calling to report a homeless guy sleeping on the front lawn of my apartment building." "Is he breathing?" "How should I know???? I'm not going to get that close!!!! That's why I'm calling!!!!") Quite frankly, I'm tired of those people who just can't seem to take women seriously.

For those who have read my Facebook status updates in the last few weeks, you have probably noticed that we have had problems with cockroaches at work. After the first chat with the facilities people (another female coworker also called that day), it didn't sound overly promising, but they did at least say they would get exterminators in that Friday evening. Since it was a Thursday at that point, we figured we could live with that; it would hopefully spare us breathing too much of whatever they used to "fumigate." Mind you, this was mid-July; it was July 15 when the exterminators first came.

Monday morning, we could tell they had sprayed some areas. We had some papers that were wet (or had been, anyway), and there was residue on computer towers and keyboards. At least two of us could taste the residue, but it was mildly comforting thinking they had done something. Of course, it didn't stop us from seeing more bugs that week. And not a single one appeared to be dying. (The most disturbing thing about cockroaches is that they are fast. When you see one running across your desk, it's rather difficult to get yourself in a position to smash it until it has completely disappeared or hidden itself behind all your electronics, wires, etc., and you can't possibly get to it without making it run more.) It also doesn't help that the carpet on our floor isn't much different in color from the cockroaches. You won't see them on the floor unless you look while they're moving.

They also set glue boards around. Of course, we haven't caught a single roach in them. On the bright side, we also now know that we don't have mice. (Although the more I think about it, the more I think I would prefer mice to roaches. They don't reproduce as quickly, and they're more likely to stay on the ground.) In any case, we have still not seen a single roach anywhere near the glue boards. It was also after the first spraying that a coworker several rows away report a roach jumping into her yogurt that morning. EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

We took extra precautions, as well. My boss always has chocolate on his desk, but we brought in containers and told him he has to keep it covered/sealed from now on. We threw out anything that may have been contaminated already and tried to be sure to seal anything else. I, for one, have not eaten at my desk in weeks, even though it often means eating alone in the cafeteria.

The following weekend, the exterminators came in again. I don't think they were quite as thorough, but we could definitely taste the residue again. We kept seeing roaches. We even gave them a couple of samples during the week of July 26-29, during which time various members of our team saw/killed more than one bug each day except Friday. Of course, it was Friday that facilities chose to talk to us, and they seemed positively thrilled that we had not seen a bug that day. Obviously, they weren't intending to do anything else... Most frustrating of all, they have been theorizing all along the way as to how the roaches got there, and they seem eager to blame someone. (But of course our theory that they came in with the new computers, whether in the machine or just in one of the boxes, couldn't possibly be true...)

That was the point where I decided to buy some bait myself. We set that out Monday, August 1. As with most roach bait, the idea is that they should get it on themselves and take it back to the nest to share, so it's hard to see whether it's actually working. However, a day or two later, I saw two roaches within 5 minutes of each other: one larger bug, looking out from under my desk, which I managed to knock to the floor with my can of forced air. Unfortunately, he got away. The second one started out on the floor; it was solely the movement that caught my eye, but I did manage to kill him. I contacted facilities again; this female coworker also called again when she found and killed one later that day. The response we both got was something along the lines of, "Thanks for letting us know. We don't understand why you're still seeing them." Ummmmm... okay. We don't either. But could you get rid of them? Because it's going to cost you a lot more if you have to fumigate or bug bomb the entire building... And it's really distracting and unproductive when you have to keep wondering when will be the next time that a cockroach jumps out at you.

This Monday was a week since we first set out the bait I bought. At least three or four large ones were seen that day, one of which got away. One was in the men's bathroom... not even in our area! (Even more disgusting, it jumped out of the paper towel dispenser when someone was going to dry his hands.) And at least one other was seen outside of our area last week. I did do some investigation on the bait I bought; apparently it takes roughly two weeks for it to be effective. Anyway...

After the sightings on Monday, my boss's boss (a male!) emailed the facilities manager about the problem, thinking that at least this way there would be some documentation. He sent off at least two emails that day, the second after the sighting in the bathroom. They promised to "spray" again. That has not been done. Today we noticed brown goop (for lack of a better description) that has been place in corners and cabinets here and there. Our best guess is that it's some kind of bait. Slightly comforting that they're finally doing something, but extremely frustrating that they didn't listen to the women who contacted them one month ago.

Then today, we were copied on an email from another man on our floor, informing the facilities manager that while the initial reports had been only from the northwest corner of the floor, the cockroaches had definitely spread to the center of the floor, there had been several sightings there, and was anything going to be done. We were also copied on the response: they plan to bug bomb.

Wait a minute, here! Seriously??? Why wasn't this done a month ago? Just because it was two women who contacted you doesn't make the roaches any less real or any less able to reproduce and spread! Okay, so it's true that we're more likely to scream and get jumpy. But we have been seeing cockroaches. Among our entire team, it has often been three or four a day--in the middle of the day. That is not normal behavior for cockroaches, unless there are a ton of them. So why weren't we taken seriously? Why did they have to wait for the men to start reporting it before they were willing to take real action?

Ultimately I'll be very grateful if they do finally follow through and eradicate the problem. But why were my complaints not taken seriously? Why were my female coworker's complaints not taken seriously? And why have we had to deal with the game of guessing where they came from, instead of facilities making certain the exterminators got rid of them? Why, why, why?

Let there be peace on earth...

I feel so blessed to live in Salt Lake and have so many opportunities for amazing FREE music! I went to the Pioneer Day Commemoration Concert (Mormon Tabernacle Choir and Orchestra at Temple Square with guests Brian Stokes Mitchell and Linda Eder) last night. My only previous exposure to Brian Stokes Mitchell was at a Tabernacle Choir Christmas concert several years ago. I had not heard of Linda Eder before. It was a treat to hear both of them!

The theme for this year's concert was "For Those Who Follow." It was a tribute not only to the pioneers who crossed the plains, but to the men and women of the armed forces, now and in the past, who have paved the way and who continue to fight for the freedoms we enjoy.

There were a couple of traditional Pioneer Day hymns. It wouldn't be Pioneer Day without "Come, Come, Ye Saints." I love the arrangement the choir sang, though! Unlike many others, it actually emphasizes "Happy day!" in the fourth verse. It does not get slower or switch to a minor key. In fact, the interlude between the third and fourth verses includes a modulation into a higher key. "And should we die before our journey's through, Happy day! All is well!" :)

Several of the other songs the choir shared are some of my favorites from them: America, the Dream Goes On; God Bless America; Battle Hymn of the Republic; and others

The first song Brian Stokes Mitchell sang was "What a Wonderful World." It was interesting to see others' faces during the singing: some of the choir members immediately behind him, and some of the people around me. You could tell by the eyes and the soft smiles who has a connection with the song. I love it. I'm not sure anything can outdo the Louis Armstrong version for me, but I love the song anyway.

He also sang "Wheels of a Dream." I don't remember hearing that one before, but it has such a wonderful message. For those who are not familiar with the song, it's a father singing to his newborn son, describing how he will show him America.

Then we got to hear Linda Eder. Her voice is gorgeous! It helps that it's a comfortable range to listen to, of course, but I'd love to hear more of her. She sang "If I Had My Way," written after September 11, 2001, and describing the peace we would love to see for all people. She also sang "I'll Be Seeing You." If I were typically a crier, I probably would have cried at that one! As she sang, they projected pictures of family members bidding goodbye to loved ones going off to war. Nearer to the end of the song, it changed to family members greeting their returning loved ones. It's a good reminder of the sacrifices made continually--not just by our armed forces, but by their families. It' a reminder that even though we have not all sent loved ones off to war, that as we go about our lives, we need to remember even the small freedoms we enjoy and the people who are still sacrificing to make that possible.

Brian Stokes Mitchell and Linda Eder joined each other, backed up by the choir, on the final song: "Let There Be Peace On Earth." The words are so simple, but the message is so powerful. Peace begins with individuals. We are children of God--meaning we are all family! I believe we can do our part to create peace, and to pray for peace. Even amidst the turmoil of the world, we can find peace within ourselves through the gospel of Jesus Christ, whose message is one of peace.

I can't really do the concert justice through my words. If you are able, I strongly recommend that you view it tonight on BYU-TV or online at 7 pm MDT. (That's 9 Eastern or 6 Pacific.) There will not be archives; I think it's either tonight or whenever it comes out on DVD. I hope you get a chance to see it; it seems like every time I go to one of these concerts, I think they can't possibly get any better. And then the next one is even better than the last. :)

The law of the fast

I found it very appropriate that I read the following verses this morning:

Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke? Is it not to dealt thy bread to the hungry, and that thou bring the poor that are cast out to thy house? when thou seest the naked, that thou cover him; and that thou hide not thyself from thine own flesh? Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the Lord shall be thy rereward. Then shalt thou call, and the Lord shall answer; thou shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am.... (Isaiah 58:6-9)

I had the opportunity today to join with others in fasting for a good friend. As Isaiah describes, fasting is not about afflicting ourselves. It is about undoing heavy burdens and breaking every yoke. And though we may fast physically, if we do so with the proper attitude, we also partake of a spiritual feast.

I have felt an outpouring of the Spirit today in my fast. I have felt the burden of worry for this friend lifted from my own shoulders, and I hope that she has felt her burden lifted (or at least lightened) as well. I have felt the love of my Savior; as Isaiah wrote: "thou shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am."

I truly am grateful for the opportunity to fast each month and for the strength I receive through fasting. I am grateful for the power of fasting and prayer, especially as friends and family unite their faith together. I have learned that when the Lord asks for a sacrifice, He also provides blessings that far outweigh the sacrifice. He is always waiting to bless His children. He loves us, and He stands ready to lighten our burdens and speak peace to our minds and hearts, if we will turn to him, place our trust in Him, and lay our burdens at His feet. Fasting is an opportunity to learn humility and to draw nearer to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. It is an opportunity to learn unity among ourselves. It is an opportunity to serve and to experience charity--the pure love of Christ. I thank my Heavenly Father for this opportunity and for His great love!

Notes from the Sister Kristen Oaks fireside

I know this Relief Society fireside was over a month ago, now, but I promised at least one person that I would share my notes. Things have been busy since then, and now I'm finally getting a chance to sit down and "share" those notes. Hopefully they'll make sense to others, as well, since my notes are often intended just for my own benefit. :)

Wheat is fungible (i.e. replaceable). We are not fungible. [This was in relation to the scripture "Satan desireth to have you, that he may sift you as wheat.] "The worth of souls is great in the sight of God" (Doctrine & Covenants 18:10).

We are celestial beings having a telestial experience.

The only way we can distinguish the voice of the Lord from the voice of the world is through the scriptures.

We need to develop anticipatory forgiveness--be willing to forgive even before people say something.

Personal revelation is for those who libe close to the Lord. The life I am living now is the life the Lord wants me to live.

Self-worth cannot be based on whether or not we are married. It is difficult not to be chosen and to be asked why we are not participating in "the game." The problem we have is that we don't have the Lord's perspective. The purpose of this life is to come unto Christ, and He needs us where we are now.

We need to focus on building our testimonies and on developing kind and nurturing hearts, remembering we will be mothers in eternity.

Don't be afraid to stand up for who you are and what you believe.

As we make plans for our lives, we need to allow the Lord to become the architect for those plans.

When life doesn't go as planned, rewrite your dream. Even righteous desires may need to be rewritten on the Lord's timeline.

Going to the temple alone is not a consolation prize. It is a consummate blessing from our Heavenly Father. [Sister Oaks mentioned that some young women in their late 20s believe they still have to wait to go to the temple, because they are not getting married. She reminded us that the temple offers blessings to all of us.] The temple will make a difference in our lives!

Education--the more you learn, the better you'll be, and the happier you'll be.

Create a quality life in the environment we are in now. It is within our powers to create holy havens. [She pointed out that there is no reason to wait for new dishes, etc., until you get married. If you want them now, instead of having hand-me-downs from relatives, why not get them?]

Service is a great antidote and makes us less selfish and more concerned for others. It also makes us more flexible. Put yourself in a situation to serve other people when they need to be served.

Membership in the church is not easy because salvation is not a cheap experience.

We need each other. Stay close to family and friends.

Respect the feelings and emotions we are given.

Keep soft hearts and do not become judgmental.

The single best thing we can do: Choose to be grateful. If we are always grateful, we will also be content.

Tragedy is the celebration for the human capacity to change. [Sorry, now I wish I'd written a little more here...]

If we do everything with an eye single to the glory of God, we cannot fail.

Do not be fungible. Be peculiar.

Doctrine and Covenants 135 (Be like the Prophet Joseph Smith--calm as a summer's morning.)

OK, these are my own words again rather than just notes. I think we all thoroughly enjoyed what Sister Oaks shared with us. The over-arching message I received was that if I am doing my best to seek and follow the Spirit and to come unto Christ, then I am where the Lord wants and needs me to be right now. As she said more than once--if we are still single, it is because that is the Lord's plan for us right now. It's nice to hear from someone who has spent most of her life single, who married for the first time in about 2000. She understands. But being single does not stop us from creating our own lives, from establishing our own identities, from progressing in the gospel and in the Lord's kingdom.

I did get to shake Elder Oaks's hand briefly before the fireside. He had just come back into town, but he wanted to be there to greet people, even though he didn't stay. I also loved the chance to sing "Grace" once more with our little women's choir. It's such a beautiful song!

So, for Mike Peck, who specifically requested these notes, and for anyone else who may find them interesting, here they are!

Time and eternity

Our sacrament hymn today gave me some new insight. I've really liked it ever since I woke up in the middle of the night, a few years ago, with it in my head. I didn't know it very well at that point, but after that I took the time to play through it and to memorize the words. Today I realized why I love its message so much. Here are the words of the hymn:

Oh thou, before the world began,

Ordained a sacrifice for man,

And by th'eternal Spirit made

An off'ring in the sinner's stead;

Our everlasting Priest art thou,

Pleading thy death for sinners now.

Thy off'ring still continues new

Before the righteous Father's view.

Thyself the Lamb forever slain;

Thy priesthood doth unchanged remain.

Thy years, O God, can never fail,

Nor thy blest work within the veil.

Oh, that our faith may never move

But stand unshaken as thy love,

Sure evidence of things unseen;

Now let it pass the years between

And view thee bleeding on the tree:

My Lord, my God, who dies for me.

As the sacrament was passed, these words kept running through my mind, and the concept of eternity began to make a little bit of sense. Jesus Christ was ordained before the creation of the earth to be our Savior. This truth is eternal. His priesthood, the same priesthood that is on the earth today, is eternal. His work and His love are eternal. I hope I can put some of my thoughts into words that will actually make sense to others.

The atonement, crucifixion, and resurrection occurred nearly 2000 years ago. But those 2000 years do not matter! Though Christ atoned for our sins at that time, the atonement is infinite and eternal. This hymn reminds us that because of the love of Christ, we can pass the years between now and then and partake of the atonement. The same holds true for those who lived and died before Christ came. It is as if He were atoning now for our sins. It is as if He had already atoned for the sins of those who lived before He lived on earth. It brings to mind Abinadi's words: "And now if Christ had not come into the world, speaking of things to come as though they had already come, there could have been no redemption" (Mosiah 16:6) and also of Alma the Younger's words: "...all is as one day with God, and time only is measured unto men" (Alma 40:8). Because of the power of God and His love for His children, He sent His Son to atone for all mankind: those who were on earth at that time, those who had already lived, and those who would yet live on earth. The atonement is real. As Amulek taught, it is the great and last sacrifice, infinite and eternal. It is personal. Jesus Christ is the Savior of the world, which means He is my Savior. I am so grateful for this knowledge. I know that Jesus Christ lives and that because He lives, I will live again. After saying all this, I can think of no better way to end this post than in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Humorous Hymns

First of all, I want to say that after attending tonight's YSA meeting, I feel less skeptical and more excited about the upcoming changes. (I'm a little disappointed that I won't even be in the same stake with some of my close friends, but I know the change is inspired, and I'm ready to make the best of it.)

Secondly, I would not normally find either one of these hymns humorous, but taken in the context of tonight's meeting I could not help smiling/laughing.

The opening hymn was "Redeemer of Israel." The third verse reads, "How long we have wandered as strangers in sin/And cried in the desert for thee..." One purpose of the change to YSA stakes and wards is to offer only two options: a YSA ward or a local, conventional ward. In other words, they want to eliminate ward hopping. "How long we have wandered..."

The closing hymn was "Let Us All Press On." Much of the meeting was focused on staying in your ward/stake boundaries, making an absolute decision (YSA or conventional ward), and reaching out to those who may not be involved in the church at this time. They mentioned how the smaller wards would give more opportunity to serve, while the YSA stakes would offer opportunity to meet other young single adults. (And of course they mentioned that YSA wards are meant to be temporary, and that they want us all to "graduate." By creating more opportunities for us to meet people, they are hoping that this will happen for more people.) In any case, when they announced the closing hymn, I couldn't help laughing, and as the girl next to me thought about it, she also found it funny. "Let us all press on... fear not... courage..." Let's get out there and be active in our wards and reach out to others... and, as always, date and look for opportunities to marry.

Episcopalian Worship Services

I had a unique opportunity today. A women's choir from our ward got to join the choir women of St. Paul's Episcopal Church for their services. We sang "Grace" (an arrangement of "Amazing Grace" to the tune of "The Water Is Wide") as well as singing the other parts of their service with them.

For those of us used to LDS services, this involved a lot of standing up and sitting down. (It sounds like a small thing, and yet it was nice to be able to sit through sacrament meeting this afternoon.) But it's great to be reminded that there are many beliefs we share with other Christian religions. The readings from the Bible, the hymns we sang, the prayers from their prayer book, all point to Jesus Christ, to His atonement, to the fact that He is our Savior and Redeemer. To watch the reverence with which they approached the altar to receive Communion, a person could conclude that we are not so different. We are all children of God, though our forms of worship may not be identical.

I truly find it a blessing to have been invited to participate. I was grateful, also, for the accommodations they made for us. As part of their choir today, we did participate in the processional before the service (and the recessional following), but they only made a brief, token bow to the altar, and they did not expect us to follow suit. They did not wear choir robes today, either. And everyone was very gracious to us. The choir members felt that we were a necessary addition to their group today, and many people thanked us for coming. All in all, it was a wonderful opportunity to build relationship of trust and respect between both faiths.

I really am amazed at the sense of community in downtown Salt Lake, even between the various religions. There are many good people of all faiths who are striving to live a good life, to be good neighbors, to seek out and help those in need.

Especially at this Easter season, it is good to remember that there are others preparing to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ. It is this miraculous event that gives meaning to mortality, that brings faith in immortality and hope in eternal life. Let us join, all Christianity, in celebrating the good news of the gospel: that Christ was resurrected, that He lives, and that He has prepared the way for us to return to Him.

A Gospel of Love

While some of these thoughts have been on my mind lately anyway, a friend's Facebook post prompted this discussion. It appears that there are many Christians of various faiths who believe that God hates sinners and will only love them when they have cast away their sin. It made me sad hearing that. "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23). No one on earth is without sin. I am so grateful for a gospel that teaches that God loves all of His children!

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved" (John 3:16-17). God so loved the world. Not the prophets only, not the righteous only, not the Christians only. God so loved the world.

It is true that God does not condone sin: "the Lord cannot look upon sin with the least degree of allowance" (Alma 45:16, Doctrine & Covenants 1:31). But that does not stop Him from loving us, from opening His arms to us, from waiting for us to repent and return to Him. I imagine His feelings must be much like those of earthly parents, who feel sorrow when their children go astray, but who never stop loving their children. If God is unchangeable, and He so loved the world, surely He still so loves the world!

The atonement is the ultimate example of love. Jesus Christ laid down His life to redeem us from our sins. He was perfect. He had no need to repent, because He had no sin. But He made it possible for us to repent, to progress to return to Him.

The atonement makes forgiveness possible. It makes grace and mercy possible. Not only can I be forgiven of my sins, but through the power of the atonement I can find the strength to forgive myself and others, to progress each day, to do things that I could not do alone. "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me" (Philippians 4:13).

This gospel is one of peace and love. It is the gospel of Jesus Christ. I know that He is my Savior, and that He knows and loves me as an individual. I am so grateful for the power of this love and for the strength and the hope that it gives me.

Oh, the workings of the subconscious mind!

I can't figure out why I keep having such weird dreams lately. Okay, so at least one or two of them were quite enjoyable--until I woke up right in the middle (not to my alarm!) and never did finish. Others of them have been rather bizarre.

Take last night for example. In my dream, I was on a day outing with my family. We were going to a museum or some such place, only it was out in the middle of nowhere. However, they had promised it wouldn't take all day, and that I could be home in time for dinner, because I had a date that night. I was excited to spend the day with my family, but I was really excited about going on a date with this particular guy.

Needless to say, something happened (I'm not really sure what), and there was no way that we were going to make it back. (That couldn't have anything to do with being out on the middle of nowhere, could it?) I pulled out my phone to text him and let him know I wouldn't be back in time and see if we could reschedule. However, as I pulled out my phone, I got a text from him...

The text said that someone (I was convinced it was his grandma, though I don't think the text actually said that) had fallen on her hand, "and whenever she falls on her hands..." I never did find out what happened when she falls on her hands, but judging by this statement, this was not the first time it had happened and there was a common result every time. Huh. In any case, he had to be with his grandma, so he was texting me to call off that night's date and reschedule. I was extremely disappointed about the date not happening, but I was also relieved not to feel stressed about getting back in time and to know that I would still get a chance to go out with him another time.

And that's about where the dream ended. Weird, huh? Any ideas as to what it might mean? (If anything...)

I have a dream...

I've been thinking this morning about what this holiday means, whether we call it Martin Luther King Day, or Civil Rights Day. In particular, I can't help thinking about the main message of Martin Luther King, Jr.'s "I Have a Dream" speech ("I have a dream" begins at about 12:13). It seems to me that his main point was extending freedom to all citizens of the country, hoping for a better world for his children than he had known himself.

Isn't that every person's dream? Don't we all hope and pray that our children, born or unborn, will know a better world and greater opportunities than we have known? Today is not about winning rights for any one race. It is not about competition between races or individuals. It is not even about celebrating one man's dream. It is about humanity. It is about understanding that we are all one race: children of God--a God who loves us and desires our happiness. It is about learning to love one another, to look beyond the outward appearance, to see ourselves and others as God sees us. It is about becoming united for the common good, even as we celebrate our differences.

This dream for humanity has not yet been fulfilled. It is certainly better than when this speech was given, nearly 50 years ago. But the day must yet come when we will all join hands, as brothers and sisters, without regard to color, religion, size, shape, etc., and sing together, "Free at last! free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!" We need to be able to say, as Thomas Jefferson penned so many years ago, "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal." We need to mean it. The blessings of liberty must, in God's due time, be extended not only to our children, but to all children, to all people. Remember that the God "inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; he remembereth the heathen; and all are alike unto God, both Jew and Gentile" (2 Nephi 26:33). We, too, must open our hearts to receive all people as children of God.