For whom the bell tolls

No, not Hemingway. John Donne. For the full text, see Meditation XVII. In Relief Society today, we discussed what are probably the most quoted lines: "No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main. If a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less., as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friend's or of thine own were: any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee."

We related this to the lesson, of course, which was "Love thy neighbor as thyself." We began and ended with these lines, and I had some thoughts as we ended that I wanted to share. Too bad we ran out of time there, but I have time here. :)

We discussed the obvious: the bell tolls for thee because nothing can happen to your neighbor without it in some way affecting you. When a piece of mankind is lost, in a way you lose a piece of yourself.

As the lesson ended, however, and we heard the words once more, "And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee," I couldn't help thinking that it could also be a call to action. In many cases, the bell tolling did represent someone's loss. But it could also be considered a cry for help. It tolls for thee (or it tolls for me!) could mean that you (I!) am being asked to step up in someone else's loss and offer those things that he or she needs most--whether it be a shoulder to cry on, a physical gift, or any other offering of love. The bell tolls for me not just because I should feel sorrow, but because I can offer service to those who may be hurting most. The bell tolls to alert us to the needs of others. In this way, we can truly be involved in mankind!

I have liked John Donne's writing since I was first introduced to a piece or two (including this one, of course!) in high school. I like his expressions of faith and the sense that he truly was involved in mankind. I am grateful for the many examples of Christianity who have gone before, and I hope that I can also develop these Christlike attributes and show greater charity to those with whom I come in contact.

What does the Book of Mormon mean to YOU?

We are studying the Book of Mormon in Gospel Doctrine (Sunday School) this year, and this question was posed in class today. The teacher suggested we go home and think about it, and it seemed like a perfect blog post.

I can't possibly convey all my thoughts and feelings about the Book of Mormon. I may make other similar posts throughout this year as we continue through the Sunday School course. The most important thing to me is that I know that it is true, that it is another testament of Jesus Christ, and that it brings people--that it brings me closer to Christ.

Every Book of Mormon prophet, both before and after Christ's birth, testified of Jesus Christ and of His life and ministry. They testified of the atonement and of the resurrection. They testified that salvation comes only in and through the name of Christ. And yet these were ordinary men. Like Paul in the New Testament, several prophets in the Book of Mormon also turned from persecuting the Church of Christ to accepting, believing, and preaching the words of Christ. These men stand as examples to us, now, reminding us that though we are imperfect, we can come unto Christ, repent, and seek to follow Him, and that we can one day be perfected in Him.

The crowning event of the Book of Mormon is Jesus Christ's visit to the people of what we now know as the Americas. He came to them following His resurrection. He taught them, just as He taught the people in the Holy Land. He healed their sick. He blessed their children. He taught them to pray. He organized His Church among them.

What does the Book of Mormon mean to me? It means that Heavenly Father loves all of His children. It means that just as Jesus Christ organized His Church in the Holy Land, He also organized it among the people on the American continent, and He has restored His gospel to the earth in these latter days. The gospel of Jesus Christ is available to all people, regardless of race, gender, or economic position. God is no respecter of persons, so it seems only logical that He would extend the blessings of the gospel to all people who will accept it.

The Book of Mormon means that God has provided a way for me to come unto Him. He has made it possible for me to study and learn His word. He wants me to know that He sent His Son to atone for my sins. He wants me to share this knowledge. As I read and study and ponder the Book of Mormon, I invite the Holy Ghost to be a part of my life.

The Book of Mormon means that God has begun to gather scattered Israel, to prepare the world for the Second Coming of Jesus Christ. I have faith that Christ was born in Bethlehem, ministered to the Israelites of His day, atoned for my sins, gave His life on the cross, and rose again the third day. I have faith that He manifested His resurrected body to His disciples in Israel as well as in the Americas. I have faith that He will come again in glory. I find great joy in this faith and knowledge.

This is what the Book of Mormon means to me: peace through the Spirit, joy in the redemption of mankind, the love of God, and a faith in Christ and a hope for things to come.

I bear testimony that the Book of Mormon is the word of God, and that it will bring us nearer to God. I know it is true. In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Stress is relative...

Today was kind of a crazy day at work, but at least I was able to focus and get a lot of work done. I've kept thinking about how a year ago today, that was definitely not the case. That was the day that I accepted a new position at work... but even that was not by any means stressful.

The anxiety came primarily from a text from my mom, letting me know that my brother, Tom, had been in an accident involving a basketball standard, and could I please let both sets of grandparents know. (In her defense, she and my dad and youngest sister, Christine, were in Florida for a dental convention; I believe my mom and Christine were at Disney World that day. But all I knew from the text was that he'd had to get staples in his head, had a concussion, and that he had had a blessing.) I think most of the stress came from having very limited information and from feeling so helpless--Tom was in Colorado on his mission, still; I was in Utah; my parents were in Florida. I know we were all worried, but none of us could actually do anything.

It helps to put things in perspective... I feel confident that it is because of his faithful missionary service and the power of the priesthood that he healed quickly and has had no after-effects.

Strange to post about this now, a full year later? Maybe. It's just been on my mind again. Just as I'm happy to be alive, I'm happy my brother is alive and well, and I'm excited for his upcoming wedding. :)

Foreign language mode? Я ничего не хочу...

(Note: for my Russian speaking friends, "Я ничего не хочу" has nothing to do with this post, except that it is the phrase that came to my mind as I sat here deciding that I've had enough of doing homework for tonight.)

I wonder if any of my polyglot friends have felt this way... I'm learning Spanish now, but I find myself thinking in Russian as soon as my very limited Spanish vocabulary/grammar fails me. I had a similar experience when I was first learning Russian, only then it was the Hebrew that would slip back in.

I guess I also felt it to some degree following my last Hebrew class, when I was first living in the German House. The first semester that I was not taking Hebrew, a friend of mine would sometimes speak to me in Hebrew. I understood everything without too much difficulty, but at that time I couldn't answer in Hebrew, no matter how much I wanted to. At some point during that semester, the German finally "clicked." I had my first dream in German, and everything just seemed to come naturally. It seems my brain finally created a partition for German, separating it from other foreign languages, recognizing it as a completely sensible, meaningful language without a need for translation. Suddenly, I could formulate sentences in Hebrew again, too. (That was entertaining, actually. This friend came by my apartment to invite me to a concert on campus, rather last minute. We held the brief conversation in Hebrew, and my roommates all assumed he had asked earlier and we'd had it planned all week long. Haha!)

That partition for German seems to have held up, but I don't think I've ever quite reached that point with any other foreign language. The Hebrew is mostly gone, from lack of use. I still remember one or two songs, and a few phrases from dialogues we memorized, but not much else. (Sad, I know... Maybe someday I'll pick it up again. If the Jerusalem Center hadn't been closed during my entire time at BYU, I might have actually found a use for it!) I think I managed to cross a hurdle in Russian which allowed me to focus on Russian without Hebrew getting in the way, but I never really reached the point of a "partition" in Russian.

So, here I am learning Spanish. We've finally learned regular "-ar" conjugations and we're starting to get a little more vocabulary, which means we're actually able to build sentences. The problem is, my vocabulary is still very limited, and once my brain switches into "foreign language mode," it still seems to think that means Russian, especially once I've reached the end of my Spanish vocabulary. I'm thinking that I need (1) to start picking up more vocabulary in Spanish and (2) to make sure I'm at least reading occasionally in Russian, so I don't lose it completely. It would be best if there could be another "partition" rather than just pushing the Russian out... Hmmmm...

Are there others out there who have learned more than one language and had similar experiences? Is there a term to describe this? I just notice that I tend to fall back on the weakest language other than the one I am currently learning. I'm not complaining so much as musing on something that I find interesting.

And the Russian phrase keeps running through my head... Я ничего не хочу! (I don't want anything! Or, more literally, I don't want nothing. I love the double negatives in Russian.) I'm done for tonight... No more homework right now. We'll try this again tomorrow.

Cockroaches, facilities maintenance, and women's voices

Odd title? Perhaps, but I'll explain. Let me say, first, that I am by no means a feminist. "Equal rights" is not appealing to me. However, I do believe that a woman's voice should be heard and taken as seriously as a man's. Unfortunately, this does not seem to be the case. I hate calling tech support and being made to feel like I'm stupid because my computer is having problems. I hate talking to police dispatch (this instance was the non-emergency number) and being expected to answer questions that should be part of their job in the first place. (For example: "I'm calling to report a homeless guy sleeping on the front lawn of my apartment building." "Is he breathing?" "How should I know???? I'm not going to get that close!!!! That's why I'm calling!!!!") Quite frankly, I'm tired of those people who just can't seem to take women seriously.

For those who have read my Facebook status updates in the last few weeks, you have probably noticed that we have had problems with cockroaches at work. After the first chat with the facilities people (another female coworker also called that day), it didn't sound overly promising, but they did at least say they would get exterminators in that Friday evening. Since it was a Thursday at that point, we figured we could live with that; it would hopefully spare us breathing too much of whatever they used to "fumigate." Mind you, this was mid-July; it was July 15 when the exterminators first came.

Monday morning, we could tell they had sprayed some areas. We had some papers that were wet (or had been, anyway), and there was residue on computer towers and keyboards. At least two of us could taste the residue, but it was mildly comforting thinking they had done something. Of course, it didn't stop us from seeing more bugs that week. And not a single one appeared to be dying. (The most disturbing thing about cockroaches is that they are fast. When you see one running across your desk, it's rather difficult to get yourself in a position to smash it until it has completely disappeared or hidden itself behind all your electronics, wires, etc., and you can't possibly get to it without making it run more.) It also doesn't help that the carpet on our floor isn't much different in color from the cockroaches. You won't see them on the floor unless you look while they're moving.

They also set glue boards around. Of course, we haven't caught a single roach in them. On the bright side, we also now know that we don't have mice. (Although the more I think about it, the more I think I would prefer mice to roaches. They don't reproduce as quickly, and they're more likely to stay on the ground.) In any case, we have still not seen a single roach anywhere near the glue boards. It was also after the first spraying that a coworker several rows away report a roach jumping into her yogurt that morning. EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

We took extra precautions, as well. My boss always has chocolate on his desk, but we brought in containers and told him he has to keep it covered/sealed from now on. We threw out anything that may have been contaminated already and tried to be sure to seal anything else. I, for one, have not eaten at my desk in weeks, even though it often means eating alone in the cafeteria.

The following weekend, the exterminators came in again. I don't think they were quite as thorough, but we could definitely taste the residue again. We kept seeing roaches. We even gave them a couple of samples during the week of July 26-29, during which time various members of our team saw/killed more than one bug each day except Friday. Of course, it was Friday that facilities chose to talk to us, and they seemed positively thrilled that we had not seen a bug that day. Obviously, they weren't intending to do anything else... Most frustrating of all, they have been theorizing all along the way as to how the roaches got there, and they seem eager to blame someone. (But of course our theory that they came in with the new computers, whether in the machine or just in one of the boxes, couldn't possibly be true...)

That was the point where I decided to buy some bait myself. We set that out Monday, August 1. As with most roach bait, the idea is that they should get it on themselves and take it back to the nest to share, so it's hard to see whether it's actually working. However, a day or two later, I saw two roaches within 5 minutes of each other: one larger bug, looking out from under my desk, which I managed to knock to the floor with my can of forced air. Unfortunately, he got away. The second one started out on the floor; it was solely the movement that caught my eye, but I did manage to kill him. I contacted facilities again; this female coworker also called again when she found and killed one later that day. The response we both got was something along the lines of, "Thanks for letting us know. We don't understand why you're still seeing them." Ummmmm... okay. We don't either. But could you get rid of them? Because it's going to cost you a lot more if you have to fumigate or bug bomb the entire building... And it's really distracting and unproductive when you have to keep wondering when will be the next time that a cockroach jumps out at you.

This Monday was a week since we first set out the bait I bought. At least three or four large ones were seen that day, one of which got away. One was in the men's bathroom... not even in our area! (Even more disgusting, it jumped out of the paper towel dispenser when someone was going to dry his hands.) And at least one other was seen outside of our area last week. I did do some investigation on the bait I bought; apparently it takes roughly two weeks for it to be effective. Anyway...

After the sightings on Monday, my boss's boss (a male!) emailed the facilities manager about the problem, thinking that at least this way there would be some documentation. He sent off at least two emails that day, the second after the sighting in the bathroom. They promised to "spray" again. That has not been done. Today we noticed brown goop (for lack of a better description) that has been place in corners and cabinets here and there. Our best guess is that it's some kind of bait. Slightly comforting that they're finally doing something, but extremely frustrating that they didn't listen to the women who contacted them one month ago.

Then today, we were copied on an email from another man on our floor, informing the facilities manager that while the initial reports had been only from the northwest corner of the floor, the cockroaches had definitely spread to the center of the floor, there had been several sightings there, and was anything going to be done. We were also copied on the response: they plan to bug bomb.

Wait a minute, here! Seriously??? Why wasn't this done a month ago? Just because it was two women who contacted you doesn't make the roaches any less real or any less able to reproduce and spread! Okay, so it's true that we're more likely to scream and get jumpy. But we have been seeing cockroaches. Among our entire team, it has often been three or four a day--in the middle of the day. That is not normal behavior for cockroaches, unless there are a ton of them. So why weren't we taken seriously? Why did they have to wait for the men to start reporting it before they were willing to take real action?

Ultimately I'll be very grateful if they do finally follow through and eradicate the problem. But why were my complaints not taken seriously? Why were my female coworker's complaints not taken seriously? And why have we had to deal with the game of guessing where they came from, instead of facilities making certain the exterminators got rid of them? Why, why, why?

Let there be peace on earth...

I feel so blessed to live in Salt Lake and have so many opportunities for amazing FREE music! I went to the Pioneer Day Commemoration Concert (Mormon Tabernacle Choir and Orchestra at Temple Square with guests Brian Stokes Mitchell and Linda Eder) last night. My only previous exposure to Brian Stokes Mitchell was at a Tabernacle Choir Christmas concert several years ago. I had not heard of Linda Eder before. It was a treat to hear both of them!

The theme for this year's concert was "For Those Who Follow." It was a tribute not only to the pioneers who crossed the plains, but to the men and women of the armed forces, now and in the past, who have paved the way and who continue to fight for the freedoms we enjoy.

There were a couple of traditional Pioneer Day hymns. It wouldn't be Pioneer Day without "Come, Come, Ye Saints." I love the arrangement the choir sang, though! Unlike many others, it actually emphasizes "Happy day!" in the fourth verse. It does not get slower or switch to a minor key. In fact, the interlude between the third and fourth verses includes a modulation into a higher key. "And should we die before our journey's through, Happy day! All is well!" :)

Several of the other songs the choir shared are some of my favorites from them: America, the Dream Goes On; God Bless America; Battle Hymn of the Republic; and others

The first song Brian Stokes Mitchell sang was "What a Wonderful World." It was interesting to see others' faces during the singing: some of the choir members immediately behind him, and some of the people around me. You could tell by the eyes and the soft smiles who has a connection with the song. I love it. I'm not sure anything can outdo the Louis Armstrong version for me, but I love the song anyway.

He also sang "Wheels of a Dream." I don't remember hearing that one before, but it has such a wonderful message. For those who are not familiar with the song, it's a father singing to his newborn son, describing how he will show him America.

Then we got to hear Linda Eder. Her voice is gorgeous! It helps that it's a comfortable range to listen to, of course, but I'd love to hear more of her. She sang "If I Had My Way," written after September 11, 2001, and describing the peace we would love to see for all people. She also sang "I'll Be Seeing You." If I were typically a crier, I probably would have cried at that one! As she sang, they projected pictures of family members bidding goodbye to loved ones going off to war. Nearer to the end of the song, it changed to family members greeting their returning loved ones. It's a good reminder of the sacrifices made continually--not just by our armed forces, but by their families. It' a reminder that even though we have not all sent loved ones off to war, that as we go about our lives, we need to remember even the small freedoms we enjoy and the people who are still sacrificing to make that possible.

Brian Stokes Mitchell and Linda Eder joined each other, backed up by the choir, on the final song: "Let There Be Peace On Earth." The words are so simple, but the message is so powerful. Peace begins with individuals. We are children of God--meaning we are all family! I believe we can do our part to create peace, and to pray for peace. Even amidst the turmoil of the world, we can find peace within ourselves through the gospel of Jesus Christ, whose message is one of peace.

I can't really do the concert justice through my words. If you are able, I strongly recommend that you view it tonight on BYU-TV or online at 7 pm MDT. (That's 9 Eastern or 6 Pacific.) There will not be archives; I think it's either tonight or whenever it comes out on DVD. I hope you get a chance to see it; it seems like every time I go to one of these concerts, I think they can't possibly get any better. And then the next one is even better than the last. :)

The law of the fast

I found it very appropriate that I read the following verses this morning:

Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke? Is it not to dealt thy bread to the hungry, and that thou bring the poor that are cast out to thy house? when thou seest the naked, that thou cover him; and that thou hide not thyself from thine own flesh? Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the Lord shall be thy rereward. Then shalt thou call, and the Lord shall answer; thou shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am.... (Isaiah 58:6-9)

I had the opportunity today to join with others in fasting for a good friend. As Isaiah describes, fasting is not about afflicting ourselves. It is about undoing heavy burdens and breaking every yoke. And though we may fast physically, if we do so with the proper attitude, we also partake of a spiritual feast.

I have felt an outpouring of the Spirit today in my fast. I have felt the burden of worry for this friend lifted from my own shoulders, and I hope that she has felt her burden lifted (or at least lightened) as well. I have felt the love of my Savior; as Isaiah wrote: "thou shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am."

I truly am grateful for the opportunity to fast each month and for the strength I receive through fasting. I am grateful for the power of fasting and prayer, especially as friends and family unite their faith together. I have learned that when the Lord asks for a sacrifice, He also provides blessings that far outweigh the sacrifice. He is always waiting to bless His children. He loves us, and He stands ready to lighten our burdens and speak peace to our minds and hearts, if we will turn to him, place our trust in Him, and lay our burdens at His feet. Fasting is an opportunity to learn humility and to draw nearer to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. It is an opportunity to learn unity among ourselves. It is an opportunity to serve and to experience charity--the pure love of Christ. I thank my Heavenly Father for this opportunity and for His great love!