Additional thoughts (as promised)

After posting last night that I don't usually cry... I came really close, after all. I teared up a little tonight. I can't even blame Ty. He was emotional even before the performance tonight, but I had no idea that he was crying during the performance. (That takes skills to continue conducting with tears in your eyes...) I watched his hand pretty carefully, but I guess I wasn't too focused on his face. Something about the music just really hit home tonight.

I don't know how to describe it. I don't know what changed. Last night was fantastic, too. Maybe it helped that I went to the temple this afternoon, before our performance. I don't know. But something about the music spoke to my heart and my soul in a way that it hasn't before.

I can't help thinking that part of it is the physical conditions. I know it may sound funny, but nobody has an easy time standing in one place for that long. I was initially worried that the second night of it would be harder. I certainly offered my own prayers not just for help in singing and carrying the message, but that I'd have the strength and energy necessary to stand through the entire performance again. It's amazing what faith and the help of the Spirit can do. :) I don't think it was easier than last night, but I made it, and I actually feel a lot less stiff than last night.

So how does it all relate? It comes back to the message being carried by the Spirit, first to the hearts of the choir and through us to our audience. It comes back to the atonement and the power to change hearts. I think perhaps there was a small, almost imperceptible change in me today. And yet not just in me. In the unity of the choir. In the love and gratitude we were each expressing--choir, soloists, orchestra, narrators, director--for our Savior and for His atonement. However small that was, whatever changed, I felt it tonight.

I need to bear testimony again. I know that Jesus Christ lives. I know He is the Son of God. I know His atonement has made it possible for me to return to Him. I know I can be strengthened and blessed each day. As Paul told the Philippians: "I can do all things in Christ which strengtheneth me." (Philippians 4:13) I have faith that Christ's atonement can and does strengthen and heal us, both physically and spiritually. I don't pretend to understand. I don't believe my mortal mind ever will. I'm still not really sure I know what was different tonight. But something was, and I feel so grateful for the opportunity to have strengthened my own testimony while sharing my testimony of Jesus Christ with others.